Tuesday, October 4, 2011



The Confucian exhortation, “if you cannot avoid rape lie back and enjoy it”, seems relevant to many circumstances that have nothing to do with the profane act he meant. A matter of not seeing the essence of a suggestion, literally! And hence, I assume that the lump in the throat that I seem to carry these days is best left to wither away on its own. Any attempt at confronting it to excise will be futile and, so I decided to see how long I can sleep  with assault ipso facto.

Consequently, I decided to witter.

There is no dearth of educated men and women in India. In fact the number of graduates and post graduates our Universities and educational syndicates hatch and consign to the outer world would even pale the alma mater of repute in the west. Quality indeed is dispensed with in Indian education. Hence there is no great astonishment when it was reported in the media that there were about four hundred applications to the post of “executioner’ when the position was advertised by the Jailor of the central prison in Thpuram. And many were post graduates! A highly literate state indeed, Kerala!

Montek Singh Aluwalia is a feline that has nine lives. And an acrobatic bureaucrat that he is, he has the uncanny knack of falling on his four from where ever you flung him down. He has survived this long as the deputy chief of the planning commission. And true to his acrobatic prowess he did a Don Quixote when he opined for the government that a daily income of above Rs 32 in urban areas and Rs 29 in rural areas shall be considered as above poverty line. Quixotic, but rude,cruel, outrageous and stupid. Or perhaps anyone out there who can do the sorcery of living on Rs 32 a day, with (roti, kapada and makkhan), food clothing and shelter?

The apartment where I lead a single life these days is shared by  two young men. Not so often I get together with them for a few sundowners over weekend. Once I walked in to their room while they were enjoying alcohol with my glass of whisky in my hand  and with flip flops on my feet. I always wear flip flops while in the house. One of the fellows jumped up aghast and requested me in serious tone that I should leave the footwear outside the room. He said there was “god “inside and pointed at the picture of the genial “Ganapathi” hung on the wall. I wondered to myself if Sri Vinayakan is pleased when it comes to whisky but frowns upon foot wear.

A few days ago I bought some good veal to cook. I ‘m not well set with kitchen wares and since I'm not sure of the duration of my stay in Bahrain, I did not invest in things like pressure cooker etc. And the two companions graciously offered me the utility of their wares should I need. While I was cleaning up the irresistible meat, one of the guys sneaked behind and intoned that I do not cook the beef in the pressure cooker as they are chaste Hindus. They would do all bad things but not touch beef even with a barge pole. I wondered to myself, why other beasts and avian lowly creatures compared to cows and bulls of the bovine world. And also what would they do to ensure that the restaurants where they  devour meat , cook beef in sterile environs.


NRIGirl said...

When you mentioned veal, my taste buds were getting ready to drool over your preparations... Alas, you ended it right there!

Did you see Balan Sir's latest post? It is mouth watering...

Insignia said...

Hypocrites! Hypocrites! Hypocrites!

Time and again; humans prove they are.

You know I am tempted to share incidents I have witnessed as part of this insanely orthodox community I belong to. But dont want to give importance to them.

Just laugh and pity them

Shilpa Garg said...

Oh My God! What hypocrisy everywhere!! Slippers, Alcohol, God, different utensils... :|
Rs 32 in your pocket per day and you are above poverty line, is simply outrageous!!
And 400 applications!! MY MY!!

Mélange said...

lol..Pity them.

Anyways,I am happy that the lights are on here at Musings.

anilkurup said...

@ NRIGirl,

I.m writing these comments early morn and I long for a wonderful steak or fry or curry .
Yes indeed Balan's post same feel . Reminded me of the Seer fish curry I had the past weekend.

@ Insignia,
Yes laugh indeed. But I cannot resist at mentioning the nonsense. Some might take a high moral ground that it is their right. I dont deny but to pooh pooh such nonsense is also my right.

@ Shilpa Garg,

Yes it is so every where . May be in all of us too this hypocrisy. Only the depth varies.

Poverty? In India? what is that?

@ Melange,

Ha thanks . What is the alternative? Cocoon miserably in darkness.

A New Beginning said...

Hypocrisy is the facade we humans love to carry. We fool ourselves with it , conviniently denying the fact that God knows everything and looks over all.

Happy Kitten said...

It is only when one gets out of Kerala, the realization hits you that beef is a taboo for many in India. Though I dont cook it often at home, it is always relished when it appears on the scene.

If one forgets the slipper and alcohol part, the eating part can be akin to me in China asked to eat a snake! Horror of horror :).. guess in the end it is always conditioning.. I would probably end up eating a snake too, if I am left in China for too long..

So are you a good cook too?
then let me wish good luck to your room mates :)

adithyasaravana said...

ha ha.. as long as i had a postgraduate friend from kerala, I was indulging in beef preparations.. but now, I belong to where I am.. I mean, our house customs doesn't allow us to have beef.. the other fortunate creatures are not forbidden..
but, MOntek's philosophy of below poverty line bowled everyone i believe..

anilkurup said...

@ New Beginning,

I guess it is not hypocrisy perse, but ignorance and inability to think.

@ Happy Kitten,
Only that I share the apartment with them. Indeed what is one's food is another's poison. But rather odd thing about the matter is the oddity itself. Which they cannot explain. Yes if I fancy snake meat why not when in China?

@ Adhityasaravanan,

Pleased to know that you have sinned ( consumed beef).You are one of the lucky ones who could relish the wonderful meat so the sin is washed away.. As for Montek it was cruel .

Daniel said...

man can give reason for everything and something beyond makes it easier for him to hold his position :)

anilkurup said...

@ Daniel

The word alibi was coined by man not God.

Arun Meethale Chirakkal said...

I loved this post for various reasons. When I was working in Mangalore, a colleague threw a seemingly innocent question to me, ‘do you eat chicken?’, ‘yeah’, I said, ‘mutton’ again I nod in affirmative, ‘beef’, ‘yes’. ‘What!!! You eat Beef?’ ‘You are a Hindu, aren’t you?’ ‘And Cow, think about it, such an innocent animal.’ ‘If cow is innocent a fowl too is, I retorted’. This time, the guy, normally very silent, who sat behind me instructed the other fella’ ‘ask him whether he believes in God’ and I said ‘no’. After staring me in horror for a while they returned to their seats shaking their heads in disbelief. It’s nauseating, this brouhaha about religion and faith. About the beef eating habits in India please see http://beef.sabhlokcity.com/2010/12/beef-eating-in-ancient-india/
And as Happy Kitten mentioned “It is only when one gets out of Kerala, the realization hits you that beef is a taboo for many in India”, the reason I was really surprised when a colleague of mine ordered (He’s a Maharashtrian) beef fry for lunch!
About Montek’s comment; it is outrageous and he has been challenged by a farmer to show how he is going to live a day with that meager amount.

anilkurup said...

@ Arun Meethale Chirakkal,

So you too are a beef eating outlaw. Welcome to the club. But do not cook fowls and other meat in the same vessel.
Montek Singh , he is cruel and indifferent than Louis XVI